my mind has died.
but the brain parenchyma is trying to live.
for instance, studying for thera ex. hmm. the concepts are to blame. and there's heavy memorization for the normal student that i am. but only trying to be noble and average, i am studying. the best part of the ordeal is the part where i died and left my head guts smeared onto the notes i made. the brain's there, but something is missing.
of course, i was trying to put my heart to it too, but cardiac muscle is resilient. but i managed anyway, and there they were, heart and brain, onto the studying part. but there is no more than words that come to me. the notes and the manual bring only words and there isnt much sense going on in my head. only, merely semantics i was studying. might as well memorize all words and recite it to myself whilst taking the exam and make sense of all of it there.
i have had my morning coffee, and too much i've taken. and now im talking about coffee like it was some drug. but for this morning, it really was. the two mugs of coffee really were, i mean. two mugs of brewed coffee. as previously described with much flamboyance in the language, "liquid velvet" i poured/gulped into my throat. and now my feet and hands are numb and tingling. and i was lethargic the whole day til about 6pm. havent done any reading properly. and the situation concerning how i am not able to comprehend my notes, coffee is to blame. those maybe six or seven cups of coffee. but i could have another one.
sh*t i was so lethargic i had to blast myself. blast my ears, i mean, with the loudest beats [i really mean just beats, not much vocals, because the The Prodigy is just a bunch of machine wielding guys, i think.] i have in my phone. and then i had to calm myself down with Amy winehouse and daniel merriweather. then i went down to watch tv. meh. lame.
anyway. coffee is something i love but makes me weak. =(