Tuesday, July 31, 2012
The longest-running (not blood-related, more than friendship) relationship i have.
(thankfully, it is still ON)
I hope i have expressed myself sweetly enough, because that is how far this is going to get. Unless i can help it.
So here, the tenth month has been reached. Yes this is the longest i have stayed/tolerated another person. Normally i dont even talk or text. But commitment brings a new color in me, figuratively. It is a combination of happines and anxiety and being careful enough not to be the normally abrasive asshole i always am with other people. Call it being two-faced, whatever. Actually, fuck you.
I am not sure how emotions got involved, from the beginning. Maybe it was mutual. More likely it pushed some things into life inside this hollow chest of mine (i cant speak for another person, so only my assumptions are on text), and it churned out something bittersweet. I generally cant say any one of my relationships, family ties, friendships and feuds included, is flatout happy -just bittersweet. So i guess by feeling that bit of challenge is the salt and pepper i need to season my life.
There are good things in my life, and there are problems. And then there is this relationship that balances everything. It is a sort of gray area where i do most of the debriefing when life gives me something awesome or crappy.
Like a homebase or something. Somewhere i would call comfortable.